Sunday, December 24, 2006

Merry Christmas to all...

Happy Ho Ho. Sorry I haven't written more lately - been busy traveling and such and it hasn't been a priority. On the plus side, I'm home for a while. Another plus? With all of the travel I've been doing, I've seen lots of military men and women. These soldiers, in whatever branch, do a tough job both here and abroad. It is nice to interact with them every now and again, and especially at this time of year when these kids are on their way home.

One guy I ran in to last week was on his way home from Iraq. He stated that he hadn't been home in three years. So, while my schedule has been hectic, these guys have been worse.

Merry Christmas to you and your families. Enjoy the time with your families, and please also keep in mind all those who can't be there in body but are always there in mind and heart.

Again, Happy Ho Ho and Merry Christmas. Bring on the roast beast and toys!!!

The Christmas Karma Train...

The two younger children spent most of today writing long, beautiful letters to Santa. The oldest? That child drew a pretty picture. Unfortunately, it portrayed mother saying: "BLAH, BLAH, BLAH" to two of her children.

Three guesses at who gets the coal...

The Christmas Red Ear Child...

Every night at dinner, the youngest has a tendency to talk rather than eat. This usually results in an ear twist until the child decides that ears are better used to listen than for grip.

Tonight, the child started singing about being the "red eared child"...

And so it begins...

Saturday, November 25, 2006

I can say "Mitsubishi"...

There is a long standing joke in our family because my sister, no matter drunk or sober, cannot say Mitsubishi. However, my wife out did her (while suffering from "turple peeth") - she couldn't say "Hugh Heffner". Don't ask where the topic came from, but suffice it to say, the name took about 10 minutes to decipher.

It's all fun and games...

Till we're playing dice and the wife begins a "good luck" lap dance...on her mother-in-law.

Other fun happenings during the dice game:

Grandma: So, what was you for Halloween?
Youngest: What was I? What was I? (emphatic hand gestures) What was I?
Grandma: Yes. What was you?
Youngest: You mean what were I? As in what did I go as? You're from Michigan Grandma, you should be able to speak proper English...
Grandma: Yes. What was you?

"No gluts, no glory" (Thank you alcohol)

Which turned into:

"No glutz (as in butt), no glory" which then generated...

Middle: Grandma and I have the best glutz.

Wife: Show us your glutz, 'cause you ain't got much... (after a particularly poor showing)

So, it's all fun and games until you get a little too rowdy...

Thursday, November 23, 2006

Happy Turkey Day!!!

Happy Thanksgiving/Turkey Day to all!!! I hope we all realize all the numbers of things we have to be thankful for. For me, pretty easy:

Family, friends, good job I enjoy (usually), and health for me and my family. Also, best puppy dog in the world. I could go on, but the biggest by far is my family (including the dog) and my friends. So, again, have a happy turkey day!!! I'm off to watch the Lions lose and see the mutant John Madden Tur-Dukken.

-D

Recent Conversation...

Me: I've got to head out for work soon...
Youngest: Where are you going?
Me: Abilene, Texas.
Youngest: Is that one of the hot parts?
Me: Well, sort of.
Youngest: Well then, wear short sleeves...

(uproarious laughter from all around)

Youngest: (as laughter dies down) I don't get why that was funny, but, whatever...

(more laughter, including tears)

Sunday, November 19, 2006

The hunt for Bambi...

So ends another year of going to the great white north on the search for Bambi. Hunting in our area has really tapered off in recent years. This year was extremely mild and should have been a pretty good year, but I truly think our herd is way down. There are lots of reasons this could be, from bears and coyotes, to the reintroduced wolves and we have lots of bobcats. There have also been several sporadic reports of mountain lions, although the DNR claims that isn't possible. All I know is that we aren't seeing the amounts of deer anywhere that we used to.

Anyway, here are the good stories from this year. Uncle shot a small 3 point opening morning. This is after the lecture about hunting for larger deer to the rest of the crew. It also took 4 shots, from both my Uncle and my Dad to kill the deer. Basically, Uncle's first shot was good, but didn't hit anything vital. When he went to check on the deer, it got up and Uncle shot again, but this time hit it in the back leg and out the hind section. Uncle came to camp for help, and the tracking began. We found the deer just inside the swamp, still alive and trying to run. It couldn't go far because the front shoulder broke and the back leg already was broken by the second shot. My Dad shot the deer in what should have been a finishing shot, but again managed to miss anything vital. Fourth shot mercifully finished the kill. So, in total, more bullets than points.

My step brother brought over his kill from earlier in the day. A nice eight point which was shot from roughly 400 yards (once I might add). Very nice hunt.

Last, my cousin (Uncle's boy) shot a beautiful eight point my last day at camp. Probably the second biggest deer I've seen taken from camp in my 20 or so odd years hunting. First shot - in the rump. Luckily for my cousin, the shot broke the deer's back or we'd still be tracking it. My cousin has no patience, so he ran up to the deer, saw it still alive, and fired the killing shot then. The deer twitched, causing my cousin to shoot two more times, both shots into the deer's neck. I think he might have been a tad bit excited. Again, a beautiful deer in the end.

My Uncle, yes, the one who wanted us all taking large bucks, also missed another small spike horn that same night.

By the time I left, our camp had two deer taken, a small three point and a large eight point, with another deer left in the field. Bullets used - EIGHT. Not exactly a banner year for deer taken, however we did pass on many small bucks in the area, so there should be a good amount of large deer next year.

So that's where that was...

Several months back, the youngest lost a large amount of money...pretty much the entire bank roll (literally). Now, the wife and I have spent lots of time trying to help the kid find the money. The child had to clean the bedroom, look through and reorganize every drawer, all to no avail. Both the wife and I remembered seeing the roll last in the child's room as well as reminding the kid to put the roll away so someone didn't "accidentally" walk away with it as kids at this age are prone to do. In the end, it was gone.

I get ready to go deer hunting last week, and guess what? We found the bank roll, right where it was left...in my winter jacket last used when we went skating with my sister, Apollo Anna Ohno. I also found my wife's Tetris (thought I'd gotten rid of that permanently - with the theft being blamed on the niece from the same trip) and my wife's cell phone charger which she thought we left in the hotel room (again - same trip).

So, while I already knew I have short term memory loss, it now also appears that I'm a pretty good kleptomaniac - but it doesn't do much good if you can't remember you took the crap...

Sunday, November 12, 2006

It's Over...

Soccer is finished for the season. Unfortunately, due to my work schedule, I was unable to coach the last several weeks of practices. One of the parents however, coached most of the kids last season, so we transitioned practices to him. Anyway, the kids continued to have fun and I truly enjoyed working with them from start to finish this season.

Final results: The kids played well, began truly playing team ball about half way through the season and I believe everyone scored. Most importantly, I and the kids had tons of fun. While we don't keep track of scores, our kids did tend to dominate every game - which of course added to the fun for competitive junkies like myself...now I can't wait until spring season.

Catching up...

For those who missed the Shnuber-Snooze, here is the origination of the term...

Enjoy!

Monday, October 30, 2006

Time to plant...the pumpkins?

The children carved their pumpkins this weekend and all of you parents know how much fun that is (it does get better with age). Anyway, the wife told the youngest to dump the guts out in the woods. A little while later, the youngest informs me that the guts have been planted leading to the following:

Youngest: Dad!! I planted pumpkin seeds!
Me: Cool. Where?
Youngest: Out back. You know, where you're trying to grow grass? (me, nodding worriedly) Yeah, right there...

So now, we pause to inform those who don't see it coming - I thought it would go without saying these seeds would, could and should be "planted" on the edge of the lawn.

Nope, these seeds have been planted right outside the back door, below the deck, where the bermuda grass is having trouble keeping root due to lack of enough sunshine. Needless to say, the seeds were dumped (not planted mind you, dumped), roughly in the middle of the back yard.

When I asked the wife? She laughed and stated she told the child to put them in the woods to grow "wild" (at least before we round-up the hill for growth control).

Gotta love kids...cause you just can't kill 'em once you've registered them for school...

Sunday, October 29, 2006

Shnuber-Shnooze...

The youngest has been very proud of what the wife terms as 6-pack abs - due primarily to laughing as they only occur when laughing. At dinner, making a play on this new phrase in our household, I began picking on myself and my "keg". This was followed by the wife stating it wasn't a keg, but a "Rick starter kit" in honor of our neighbors from when we were in Michigan. From here though, the oldest says: "I thought it was twins..." to which the entire family began roaring with laughter.

Unfortunately, the youngest, eating a healthy dinner of Lucky Charms (no, I don't know why), was in the middle of drinking the milk from the bowl. The child, overcome with laughter, leaned over and began pouring milk out the mouth and nose in equal amounts. The kid was laughing so hard, I swore milk was going to come out the eyeballs.

In Uncle Scott's phrasing, this is called a classic Snuber-Shnooze - which made us all laugh even harder...someday, we might (or he might) even fill the rest of you in on what exactly a Shnuber-Shnooze really is (oh, the famous origins of the Shnuber-Shnooze)...

Happy Halloween...

It is that time of year again. The time, when even the regular spiders don't bother the wife so much...

This year, we were told about a wonderful hay ride which goes on near here. Last night we went and had a wonderful time. There is the hay ride, with wonderfully spooky sights from ghosts to goblins, but they also had several people dressed all in black startling everyone in the wagons. Top that off with scarecrows shouting to leave and blacksmiths chasing you with literally red hot metal. In the middle, you stop for stories and then warm cider. From there, it is back on the path to be spooked and startled. By the end, we were giggling and laughing, just the way life should be. So, I'll leave you with visions of bats and spiders, ghosts and goblins, and the very warmest Halloween wishes we can this year (even if they are early)!!!

Friday, October 27, 2006

Travel Sucks...

I had a very annoying set of travels this week. Started by going to Dallas, then on to St. Louis and finally back to Dallas on short notice. The common thread? Horrible service from the airlines to the restarants. Even grading down on the fact that most of the restaurants were airport doesn't account for it. I have routinely tipped well, but thi trip is causing me to rethink. Someday I'll make it home...

Monday, October 16, 2006

300 Million Born...

CNN is reporting that the US will surpass 300 million people as of 7:46am tomorrow. Amazing - 100 million more Americans have come to life in the last 40 years.

Wednesday, October 11, 2006

Weekend...

Returned home for a relative's wedding. Beatiful wedding, wonderful reception. All in all, well done. Nice to see relatives, visit and to enjoy the experience. Now, to the important thing:

Congratulations!!!! Good luck. Enjoy embarking on your new life together. It's not always easy, but it is worth it.

Monday, September 25, 2006

NFL Sunday...

And once again, the Detroit Lions take all of 3 games to establish themselves in the running for worst NFL team of the season and to ruin the hope and expectations of every Lions fan. After watching Green Bay (Green Bay?!?!) dismantle them, it is past time for the chanting to begin...

FIRE MILLEN!!!

Count on a Thanksgiving day win, but otherwise, the record won't matter as the team continues to under acheive.

Tuesday, September 19, 2006

Inexcusable...

Too many articles to link to. I think I'll start with this one. It explains how a leader of the hunger strike at Gitmo last year has been treated since. Even if you don't buy all of the story, there has to be enough shreds of truth to scare you. Add to this, the guy hasn't been charged with anything, let alone been tried or convicted. The best we can say is that he's accused of having terrorist ties. Feel that moral high ground we've always attempted to retain as a country slipping?

Then, there's this story. A Canadian citizen is taken off a flight in the US, interrogated, flown to Jordan, driven to Syria, and held for 10 months while being beaten, put in a coffin sized compartment, sleep deprived, (basically, all the fun things said not to happen have been documented in this case). Absolutely ridiculous. This man was asked by the Canadian government to be put on a watchlist. A mistake to be sure, but what authorized his illegal arrest and detainment? What authorized his torture?

We have a law in the US. Simply put, if arrested, you are to be charged within a certain amount of time or released. This time is a matter of days - not weeks, months, years. We have another law here. It states a right to a speedy trial. These men, and many others, haven't received that. Granted, they aren't US citizens. Should that make a difference? To me, not one bit.

Take a good look at these stories. These men weren't treated humanely from what I understand. That fact then precipitates a break in the Geneva convention - something our President would like to have modified heavily. As with everything else to do with fighting terrorism, our government is acting, usually unlawfully, first and then trying to adjust the laws to their methods. Even were this not the case, it ruins our position as a global leader.

Our government, through several administrations - certainly longer than I've been alive, has taken upon itself to be the world's policeman. Like any policeman however, you must earn respect. You do that by standing up for the people and their rights. You do that by first living the rules you swear to enforce. You do that by fostering trust, not just with the good citizens, but also with the bad ones. You don't do it by ignoring everything and becoming basically the same as what you are fighting. I don't think we're quite to this last point, but I don't doubt we are on our way. Folks, there's a new sherrif in town. One that is at best, one step removed from the criminals.

Some of you may ask what's wrong with this. The majority of the people they have are terrorists and can probably be proven so. The needs of the many outweigh the needs of the few mistakes. Good arguments that can probably be supported well. All I ask is that you think about a scenario where you are in an innocent's position. Think about it if it was a wife, daughter, son, brother, mother, father in that same position. Wouldn't you want someone to at least stand up for what is supposed to happen? The way these things have been handled are wrong and it does nothing more than to solidify the position against us. It needs to stop and the people in charge need to be held accountable.

Saturday, September 16, 2006

Monopoly

My husband created a monster! While I am recooperating, my hubby is being very sweet and trying to occupy the kids as to let me rest. So to keep them entertained, he suggests Monopoly. This sounds nice, kind, etc....however you don't know my husbands (and family's) history with this seemingly innocent board game. Only myself and my brother-in-law know the ramifications of this horrid game. It started out well, kids smiling, having fun, cheering, laughing.....then the monopolies were formed and the real butt kicking began. There was no mercy for age difference or lack of knowledge of the game. Our middle child picked up on all of this quickly and is now a tyrant at this game. The game ended up taking 2 days to play and the hubby giving up and the son whimpering in a corner. Her nick name is now Butcher Jr.

Thursday, September 14, 2006

I Love My Wife...

My wife (recuperating nicely from her minor operation) was bored out of her mind. To distract her boredom, she asked me to play cards with her. Now, realizing I didn't want to play cards, I still sympathized with the fact that you can only watch so much TV when you have limited mobility and I reluctantly acquiesced.

Probably not the wisest thing to do.

First, we played a game the mother-in-law taught us a couple months ago. This is mind you, a game I've not lost at but less than a handful of times since learning it. The wife being on drugs didn't help her case. Game over, wife refuses to play that game any more.

So what does she wish to play? Gin-Rummy. Yep, same game I mercilessly beat her at while she was in labor with each of our children. End result? Even better than the first game. The last hand, I need 15 points to go out and am ahead by 100. My wife's cards? Yep, she had laid down 5 cards - all playing off of my hand. No runs, no matches. Again - ALL.OFF.MY.HAND. Needless to say, she wanted to play 52 pickup when we were done.

Yep, I beat her at that one too.

Who says I've got a competitive streak?

Wednesday, September 13, 2006

Detroit Basketball...

I'm sorry. I was very remiss. Detroit Basketball has won another championship. The Detroit Shock won the WNBA title over the weekend. Congrats to them and coaches Lambeer and Mahorn.

Been a good year in Detroit sports:

Red Wings have best record in NHL.
Pistons have best record in NBA.
Tigers have dominating season in MLB.
Shock win second title in WNBA.

Then, there's the Lions; not scoring TD's and losing heartbreakers to good teams. Just wait until they play the Packer's and lose by 30. FIRE MILLEN!!!

Monday, September 11, 2006

Remembrance...

I know that none of us Americans will ever forget the sights, sounds, thoughts and feelings of what happened 5 years ago today. This, more so than any event in my lifetime, has truly defined our nation and shown the world what we are made of.

In many things, there is so much to be proud of: the first responders that day, the search and rescue workers that followed in the days and weeks afterwards, the awe and respect we had for each other as Americans, our wonderful armed services and their complete faith and dedication before, during and after the momentous events of the last five years. With these and many other events, we showed the terrorists and the world that we will survive and that we, as a nation, are strong and caring.

These situations, however, have another side. This side contains Abu Ghraib, unlawful, government authorized, phone taps, secret CIA prisons, known terrorist prisons where people are being held without representation or charges - such as Guantanamo Bay, and many others. I'm sure that others could be named, but through these events, we've shown the world that we do not own the moral high ground, and what's more, that we are scared.

To me, the best tribute we can give those who died and those who live, would be to regain our moral compass. Abu Ghraib - regardless of how it came about - cannot be allowed to happen again - ever. Our government needs to be held accountable for its unlawful actions in the fight against terror. Make no mistake, if phone taps and prisons truly are the best way to fight terror, so be it. I do feel though, that the government MUST follow the laws set forth or work to generate the appropriate changes necessary. They cannot be allowed to illegally pursue paths which are fundamentally dangerous to what we, as a country, were founded on. Think of it - there is outrage because websites like Facebook more easily display what has been openly authored (similar to this blog), yet where is the outrage when we find out that MILLIONS of conversations have been unlawfully recorded, people are arrested and held WITHOUT charges, or better yet, held in secret CIA prisons because they are SUSPECTED terrorists. What happened to innocent until proven guilty? Freedom of speech? Right to privacy?

I've disagreed with the principle and reasons behind going to war in Iraq. Not because I think Saddam was a great guy, but because I worry about the unintended consequences. Many people say that at least we are fighting the terrorists over there - but to me, what we're doing is training the terrorists. Unfortunately, it is a situation we created and concientiously, we cannot abandon the fight for freedom we started there. It would only make the situation that much worse.

Yes, I'll remember, every day that I'm lucky to be alive, the sights, sounds, and even the horror and terror I felt that day five years ago. I'll remember those that lost their lives and the heroes then and now. I'll keep in mind that bravery isn't fearlessness, just an ability to act without letting fear paralyze you or turn you from your morals. In addition, we also need to keep in mind that we still need to fix the things that were, are or have become broken as a part of this tragedy. The main purpose for this is because we cannot allow ourselves to abandon our principles in this struggle. Many innocent people gave their lives five years ago because others felt they had the moral right to take their lives. Many more heroes die everyday fighting for our freedoms, rights, beliefs and ultimately, our morals.

So, the question becomes, do we tribute those lost their lives with forfeiting our freedoms, beliefs and our morals? Or do we use our morals as a guidepost to find the appropriate path to safeguard our freedoms and beliefs?

Sunday, September 10, 2006

Coaching is fun...

As I mentioned in a previous post, I have been drafted to coach soccer. Our team name (given, not requested)? England. The kids and I have been having a tough time coming up with something they can shout in the huddle...("Bloody Hell" just doesn't feel like something the kids should be shouting every week). Anyway, the middle has come up with the perfect slogan - "Tally-Ho".

This weekend was our first game and the kids all played exceptionally well. There was passing and shooting and scoring. Both teams seemed to have fun and the majority of the kids seemed to be learning much better control - which is all to the good.

The most surprising part of this experience to me? I knew I'd have fun with the kids (provided they still would pay attention to their "silly" coach) - I always do. Nope, the most surprising thing to me is to watch the pure, unadulterated joy the kids have when we are playing - both in practice and in yesterday's game. The idea, as with any kids sport at this age, is to have fun - first, foremost and always. Secondary is to learn lasting skills for the game and teamwork. None of it will stick with you or matter if you don't first have fun.

To this, I've found that I can truly unleash my inner child and play with the kids as much as coach. They've been very receptive to listening still, but they enjoy being there and many are unhappy when practices end. Their favorite game? A little game called "Hit the Coach" which I'm sure most coaches in this age group play at one time or another. For the kids - if they can hit me 3 times, I run a lap. If not, they run the lap. Generally, we play at least two rounds and the kids are allowed to win one. Best part? They run the lap with me anyway. This just seems to put the topper on the practice - with the kids enjoying the game, but also enjoying winning.

Now, to see if I can keep up running this much after every practice for the next 3 months...

Happy Birthday to me...

Ahhh, I am getting into the venerable age group. I'd like to say that with getting older comes more wisdom, but that seems to just be something the senile ones tell themselves so they can avoid being called crazy.

So far today, my children have tortured and made fun of me. My wife ruined one of my favorite Johnny Cash songs (bonus points if you can figure out which one) and my sister and family have called to make fun of me some more (yep, all those years growing up don't seem to count any more). The only good thing is how frustrated my wife is getting by all the calls from people who only call to talk to her, for today only, not wanting to talk with her but with me...tee hee.

Anyway, when it's all said and done, I am lucky to have great family and friends who remember me and remind me of all the smiles we've shared and of all the ones to come. It's been pretty low key this year (highlight being having some time to dedicate to working on the basement...), but still very nice.

Thanks to all...

*******
Update:

I want to make this clear - my birthday has been low key because I wanted it that way. Working on the basement IS what I want to do (and the family has been wonderful about helping). Fact of the matter is, I am old, tired, slow and no longer able (or willing) to get off the porch much. I am lucky to have a wonderful family and a great life - which is all that I ever want. Thanks to all who make life this much fun and lessen the need for anything else.

Wednesday, August 30, 2006

Tis the Season...

Soccer started Monday. To make life even more eventful? I was drafted as Coach. I've now been waiting for the season to start with trepidation. First day of practice however went off without a hitch. We've got a great group of kids, and we really had fun...myself included. All in all, with the first one out of the way (and the drafting of two experienced coaches for assistants), life is good.

Now, if only the homeowner's board stuff goes this smoothly...

Wife thinks I'm biting off more than I can chew...

Gee, ya think? Well, there's worse ways to overdo I guess...

Sunday, August 27, 2006

Failure...

This search sums up many people's sentiments I think...

Be back on time...

Me: Be back by 3:00pm.
Middle: (Whining) But Dad, it's already 2:69...
Me: Wha?!?!

(crickets)

Me: Genious, that's the cable TV channel...

Saturday, August 26, 2006

Thoughts of family...

I need to mention a friend of mine. This is a close friend, whom for years I've lived somewhat vicariously through. Not because she's necessarily that exciting or anything, but she does have some of the best moments.

There was the time she knew a family of boys...5 of them...and dated them all...at the same time (or near enough).

There was the time that a random co-worker brought her lunch. Nope, not from a restaurant, but a brown bag lunch from home.

There were the stalkers and other offers too numerous to count which have for years provided me with endless entertainment. Through it all, she has been a strong willed, devouted daughter and a great person too.

Unfortunately, recently, her father passed away. As a result, I'm asking all of you to keep her and her family in your thoughts. I know she'll be in mine that time will ease the pain, even if it can't take it away entirely. I know also, they'll be all right, but that warm thoughts always help. For the rest of us, this should also be a lesson to us to remember our loved ones.

Time is short, so enjoy the time you have so that the memories will have trouble fading.

Why my eye twitches...

The youngest is at a very percocious age. I think the child is trying to kill me. Today, we went to the amusement park and as soon as we told the kids, they all got very over excited - to the point we almost had to cancel the trip. Everything at the park was fine, but once done...geez, you would have thought world war three was starting - with the youngest being at the center of most of the ruccous.

Eventually, it got to the point where I started dropping bed time to earlier and earlier, which is how this happened...

Me: That's it. Bedtime at 7pm.
Youngest: What?!? But why? (in the best whiny voice possible)
Me: (crickets)

A couple minutes later, another ruccous is started...

Me: OK, now we're at 6:55pm...
Youngest: NOOOOOO!!!!!

(rest of car is silent)

Me: Fine, yours is now 6:50pm...
Youngest: NOOOO!!!! Why?? I didn't do anything...NOOOOO!!!! Please...
Me: (to wife) That child is a slow learner...
Youngest: (dropping all whining) Yep. That's me. Slow learner, fast runner...

(SMACK)

Me: How fast are you when you're strapped in a car? Hmmm, not fast enough. 6:45pm bedtime, suggest you stop while your still here to go to bed...

Okay, so maybe, just maybe, the part from the smack on down is what I WANTED to have happen if it weren't for DFACS. In part because that piece didn't happen, my eye is twitching and the child decided just before dinner that the dining chairs would make a good tunnel to crawl through. The kid won't make it much longer, DFACS or no...

How's that again?

Middle child (Shaking a partially frozen water bottle and talking to the youngest): Don't do this. It makes a lot of noise...

(continued shaking)


Mom: Child, please stop shaking that. It is very annoying.
Middle child: See what I mean?

Tuesday, August 22, 2006

Thank you Uncle Scott

Today while driving down the road carting kids to various after-school activities, I am, once again, reminded to thank my bro-in-law for his creative verbage. Out of my 8 year old girls mouth... "wow, I'm glad I don't have a jimmy, it would really hurt to get hit in your jimmy." Thank you so much!

Monday, August 14, 2006

Follow the leader...

Sis: Since your kids are going to school tomorrow, I decided mine needed to start getting up earlier...
Me: Wha?!?!?!...
Sis: Yeah, I told them your kids were going to school and they needed to start preparing, so they need to be up by nine. They weren't happy...
Wife: That's OK, we told our kids that whenever yours get grounded, they lose allowance...
Me: Did you hear that oldest? You lose allowance whenever they do...and the nephew is grounded for the rest of the summer. No allowance for you for the rest of the summer...
Oldest: NOOOOOO....Wait. Summer ends today...OK.
Me: Yep, I think it still stinks for the neice and nephew...
Sis: Oh, shut up...

Tuesday, August 01, 2006

They're gone...

The crowd has headed for the hills. The homestead is quiet (but not too quiet) and life is slowly and surely headed back to norm. Everyone is exhausted. All in all, it was a great time with lots of memories and cheer. Time for my nap however...

Friday, July 28, 2006

Fun with the fam...

Ever have one of those nights? You know, the nights where you hang with the family, adults and kids and play a little game called "Sally Walker"? Point being to walk in a circle, pick someone, do a dance, then the person you pick has to do the same thing? Yeah, neither did I until now. Video will be coming soon, although I may have to post it on youtube.com at the same time...(assuming I can secure the rights of all parties involved as they WILL be embarassed).

Anyway, that led us to Roll with Saget and then over to youtube.com. There, we played with the Chinese Backstreet Boys and others. Best was still Evolution of Dance.

Picture if you will, 8 people: 6 adults and two older children, huddled around a laptop screen, watching internet video. And they say IPTV won't ever make it...HA!!!

Monday, July 24, 2006

STOP THE PRESSES!!! The eye liner wars have begun...

The eye liner wars have begun: Teenager loses eye liner to pirates prior to head exploding.

Several of the rugrats found the hidden eye liner (the stuff I've been unable to find for months mind you). A couple, behaving as pirates, decided to use this "toy" to great advantage. Others decided to write on each others faces with it as a gag. When the teenager whom the eye liner belongs to discovered this catastrophe, a gasket was blown, lifting the roof off the house about 6 inches and moving it two to the right.

When the laughter finally calmed down, it was with great pleasure that the owner of the eye liner figured out there was a sharpener, while with great regret, the others discovered that it isn't very easy to wash off the stuff.

Enjoy the writing - next time, try writing winner...

Verbiage Lessons at the Dinner table (Vol. 212 and 213)...

Vol. 212

Neice: ...and we were playin' wit our cousins...
Me: Playin' wit? What happened to the "g" and "h"? Did they get lost?
Neice: Huh?
Me: "Playin' wit" is not what I think you meant to say. I think you meant to say "playing with" which has a "g" on the end of playing and an "h" on the end of with...
Neice: Oh.
Me: Wit kind of means funny...
Nephew: I'm a wit...
Oldest: Yeah, you're a nit wit...

Vol. 213

Youngest: ...and we were lickin' fer...
Me: "Lickin' fer"? Do you mean "looking for"?
Youngest: Yeah. Same difference Dad.
Me: Um. No. Not even close. In one instance, you are seeking something - as in: "I was looking for the remote control". In the other instance, you are licking fur. As in, the dog has a spot of food and you licked it off of her. One makes sense, the other is disgusting - especially after the dog has licked her butt. Nope, not the same thing at all...

Ahhh, that last one would be my wife's redneck child emerging.

What was I thinking?

Sis: I was touched by you saying you missed me.
Me: When did I say that? I would never say that nor admit to it if I did...
Sis: It was on your blog. I have it in writing that you miss me...
Me: I didn't write that, it was ghost written and they misinterpretted the notes...
Sis: Uh-huh. It had your id...
Me: Wait. When did you learn to read?

*crickets*

Damn internet. Causing no ends of trouble for unsuspecting gushing little brothers who forget others can read too...

We're baaaaack...

Back from the camping trip and thought I'd share a few little tidbits:

1) 7 kids, 4 adults. 'Nuff said.

2) The dog HATED the neighbors forcing us to put her on a leash after a short while for the entire duration they were there. For those of you who know Minnie, this is a rare occurrence that she would continually go forth and bark at the neighbors. Apparently her instincts are spot on however, since all of the adults had to resist the urge to go and bark ourselves at the neighbors long about 2am when the drunks were still screaming (drunkenly) in the rain. This is still prior to when they started the dance party from their car at 2:15am

3) Rained all weekend. I blamed the neice and nephew which went over well - until it hurt the neice's feelings. Call me Uncle Heel.

4) Kids played all weekend on "Pride Rock" and no one fell the 20 feet to the ground. Simply amazing.

5) The older children came home with red knuckles. (Thanks for kicking my butt at the hand slap game as a kid, sis. Now I understand why you did it...)

6) Who knew that the new tent came not only with air conditioning (a brand spanking hole), but also an indoor pool? Have I mentioned I dislike rain on camping trips?

7) The dog's snack attacked the nephew.

No, seriously. One of the neighbors brought along a puppy pug, who thought Minnie would be great fun. Unfortunately, she HATES other dogs, especially yippie little pugs apparently. So, while the little wiener schnizzle ran up and I corralled my "fiercesome beast" (at least when it comes to animals weighing less than 10 ozs), she started barking. This caused the pug to change direction and "leap" (white man style) at the nephew who proceeded to scream like a little girl "it's attacking me...get it away!!!". I picked up the pug/rat just as soon as the tears subsided, I promise.

8) Several of the brood missed the pug/rat and decided to generate the best quote and tag line of the weekend.

Middle: Mom, we're going to walk over to the other camp site, for no apparent reason, just because we didn't get to see the dog and we want to. Is that OK with you? (This was the money quote).
Mom: So basically, what you are telling me is that you have no reason to go there, but to ogle the neighbors dog, so you are making up a reason?
Middle: Yep, that just about sums it up.
Me: So, you're going to go do a walk by pugging? (This is now officially my new tag line)


All in all, we had lots of fun on the trip. Kids were pretty good, rain stayed mostly at night, and we were able to laugh and enjoy it. I'm sure there will be other good stories coming soon as the house becomes loaded...stay tuned...

Sunday, July 16, 2006

Preparing for the masses...

You know what it's like when no one is around and it's all silent? For me, it's terrifying. For better than 13 years, I've had no quiet in my household for more than a few minutes at a time. Last night, with the wife gone to get the kids (with extras), it was just me and the dog and the quiet. In short, it was no fun at all. I ended up hanging with the neighbors, going out for a late dinner and playing some pool. Not a bad time, but damn it, I wanted my family HOME. It has been too long.

So, today, while waiting for the family to come home, the dog and I did some chores and anything else we could think of to pass the time. Finally, in the early afternoon, the family + 2 were home. The dog was so excited, she threw up - TWICE. I was so excited, I couldn't stop hugging them all. Within a few minutes, the house was awash with sound, giggling and sweet family NOISE. Little louder than I remember, but fun all the same.

Now, our family of 5 is currently a family of 7 with the addition of our neice and nephew whom I've missed so very much. In roughly a week and a half, the home will be filled to capacity with ELEVEN people. I'm looking forward to it, but it will be a LOT of work preparing for the masses. No matter what happens though, it is good to be home with FAMILY. I've missed the little rug rats, their noise and the joy they bring to things. I've also missed my sister and brother in law, who, once they get over the noise deprivation, will be coming to get their noise makers as part of the eleven.

Bring on the noise of a happy, healthy home full!

Tuesday, July 11, 2006

Going, going...

<Begin Rant>
This tears it. *Note: I have not verified the linked story separately*. I am absolutely fed up with the federal government feeling the American people should have no rights. Between phone taps and online taps and other electronic surveillance, I am completely fed up.

Honestly, how many people feel safer now than before 9/11? All of you that raised your hands (one, two, three) - is this because there hasn't been an attack, or because you feel the government changed something to make things safer? Personally, I see no major difference now than pre-9/11 and the changes I do see tend to be more red tape and hassle than truly safeguards. Travelling is just as dangerous or more so. Government reaction to catastrophies has declined (Katrina anyone?). How many people are still being held at Gitmo without trials and due process? How many people are being scooped up under the flag of terrorists, but without any proof? Kids, those guys in Miami - yeah, they weren't even armed, nor dangerous to anyone beyond themselves.

Frankly, enough is enough. Americans have a choice. We can stand up for our right to privacy, or we can meekly submit that maybe Big Brother knows best. Personally, I think Orson Wells may have been off by about 20 years, but the reports coming out are very similar to "1985". Not only that, but assuming this is how the government feels the fight on terrorism at home should be fought, why aren't these things going through proper channels? Why not get a federally approved wiretap as opposed to setting up an operation without juris prudence?

You know what? I may not have much to say or many people to say it to, but, I have the right to say whatever it is I want whenever, and to whoever I want to say it. If the government fears my freedom of speech, let them go through the proper channels to set up these taps and the like. Backdoors in equipment? Bad idea. Illegal wiretaps? Bad idea. Open email text? Bad idea. You know, I have enough trouble securing my equipment without the government creating new and exciting ways for bad people to monitor and steal from me. Not only that, but these changes would grant anyone with limited ability to beat whatever encryption I use for off network traffic - meaning nothing would be safe. So, it may come to a point where all of my communication, both on and off network, will need to be encrypted - including voice - just so I can talk to my mother without worrying how what I say may be taken.

Americans, stop worrying about prayer in schools, not a government sanctioned right, and start worrying about the rights you do have, that our soldiers have and are dying for, which are being taken away. If my kids want to pray in school, they can - no one can or will stop them - however, Bobby down the street doesn't have to. If my kids want to call me and complain about their teacher, they should be able to without Dubya getting the call unbeknownst to ANYONE.

Your rights are going, going and almost gone. Along with that will go your (data) security if we aren't careful.
<End Rant>

We now return you to your regularly scheduled program.

Monday, July 10, 2006

We're number 1...

On a yahoo search. Imagine that, search for "Price Crew" brought this site up first. Like 99 million other blogs can't replicate that little gem...hehe

Saturday, July 08, 2006

Germany wins....

Well, I am inebriated before 5pm.....We went to see the world cup game between the white and red team aka.....Germany and Portugal. Of course I didn't know this and had to be schooled. I am a hockey fan. But must say soccer is quite fun to watch, especailly after 4 pints. Germany won!!! I guess that is who is we wanted to won considering we were with someone from England and apparently they hate Portuagal.....whatever.....just give me another pint along with some yummy fried onionrings. YUM!!!! It is quite amazing the things you see at a bar....especially when you don't tend to frequent them....I love the coin slots, ass crack on 40ish fat men, and the 60ish yr. old men who don't lock the restroom doors and then they tell you it's ok, like you were sorry you walked in on them shaking.....no dumby.....you should apologize, because I never really needed to see something like that!!! Anyways, it was still quite fun, however, it is quite difficult to type being inebriated and all. I love the delete button. Hubby is now kissing my ear...gotta go. No kids till.......Saturday.

Thursday, July 06, 2006

Now they've done it...

Franklin and Fronda are happy parents. Mom and baby are fine and all three are looking forward to 18 years of mutual torment.

Congratulations guys!!! Hope you've rested up, since you won't get that kind of stuff for a long while...

Monday, July 03, 2006

Let the noise begin...

We've discovered since the children away, that the parents are too old to play. Not only that, but the dog and I are both afflicted with the "it just ain't right" disease. Neither one of us appears to be able to handle the quiet, with me wanting to be away from the house to avoid it and the dog just whining to be outside so she can wait for her kids to come home...

Needless to say, the wife has had enough of both of us. ;)

Just can't wait for the noise to begin - the countdown is still going too slow. Two more weeks...

Goodbye Captain...

The old stomping ground has lost another hero. An icon from the word go, whether or not you paid any attention to the sport or not. Steve Yzerman has determined it was time to retire from the sport which gave him so much, and which he returned 10 fold. The Captain has given so many of us such wonderful memories during his illustrious career and we, the fans, will miss him dearly. Never in my memory has a player truly played with such heart and determination as Stevie Y consistently did year in and year out. He sacrificed personal goals for team success and it paid off in 3 cup triumphs.

It's been a great run Captain. Thank you so much for the memories. We'll miss you, but I'm sure we'll see you in the front office or in the booth. Good luck!

Thursday, June 29, 2006

Sooooooo Quiet!!!!

The kids are all in MI with various family members until July 15th. While I am LOVING this time to ourselves, it is eerily quiet in our house. Very odd in fact. I am so used to doing 15 thousand things at once along with the conversations to go with it. It's kind of weird to just chat with my hubby. Though, so far, I have found I really DO like my hubby and enjoy his company. So I guess all is well in my quiet house. Cheers to the kids and cheers to being able to go wine tasting!!!

Monday, June 19, 2006

Fish bait

This one must fall under the already senile part for my hubby, because I cannot believe he forgot this precious memory from the same day. The kids were all enjoying themselves diving and jumping off the dock, when the son pops up off the ladder to announce to all that a fish just bit his nipple. After composing myself, I could then see that he indeed was bit by a fish on the nipple; it left a bite shaped bruise.

And so the nickname Fish Bait was born!!!

Happy Belated Father's Day...

I realize this is late, but I was off doing the "fatherly" thing...

The family was busy this weekend, and frankly, this was just fine with me. See, while being a father is a big reason for why I blog - primarily to keep a record of various family related things I'd rather not forget when I'm old and senile (like next year), I realize I still need to make time to make the memories.

Memories like:

Children going for a ride on a pontoon boat for the first time and the middle returning to say "It was fun, but they wouldn't let us stand up even though it was going ridiculously slow".

Mom helping the kids get me a Father's Day gift...which she'd already given me for Christmas...(hey, at least it wasn't a tie).

So many others, but this all explains why our life is a sitcom (as the neighbors describe it), and why we, above almost all else, enjoy each others company.

To my family - thanks for making me feel like the greatest Dad ever. To every other father out there - congratulations!

Sunday, June 11, 2006

Happy Anniversary...

The wife and I made it 11 years as of yesterday (and we still kinda like each other). We celebrated by having a neighborhood party that was more impromptu than anything. We blocked off the street, played with the dozens of kids and just had a generally fun time. So, with basketball and water balloon fights, slip and slide and sprinklers, and let's not forget friends and adult kool-aid, it was a very nice time.

Now for the cleanup...

Overheard...

Neighbor: Honey, I've got ass-butter.

Yep, that was my take on it too...

Friday, June 09, 2006

The joy of teens...

While out at Six Flags with the kids, getting on a ride:

Mom: Teens! Sit! Good Teens...

(and the crowd goes wild). While back at home:

Me: Stop annoying the teens child...
Teen Friend 1: Yes, we have cell phones...
Me: What? Are you going to call and annoy us to death?
Teen Friend 1: Umm, well, we could poke with the antenae...
Teen Friend 2: (directed to Oldest and Teen Friend 1) You both are so blond...
Me: So, what were we talking about?

*crickets*

Me: Who should be blond?

Ahh, the joys of teenage angst...I mean, torture... ;)

Sunday, June 04, 2006

Detroit Sports...

Why do I dislike Detroit sports? For reasons like this year... How do both NHL and NBA teams lead their respective leagues all season and fall apart in the playoffs? I mean, the Wings are known for collapsing - and again, it was not for goaltending. Both teams decided they would win because it was owed them - which led to their respective collapse.

The Wings chose not to play the full game and Edmonton, due mainly to a ton of grit and hard work, defeated them. It is truly tough for me to say the better team went home when the better team decided it didn't have to play hard for the full 60 minutes. So, with that said, good luck to the Oilers in the Finals - a place you worked hard for and truly earned.

The Pistons? I am truly disappointed. This is a team which I started paying close attention to about 5 years ago - and not because they were elite, but because they were a gritty, hard working TEAM. That grit and hard work paid off with a title two years ago and an almost title last year. This year? 64 wins and a dominating season. With all of this, it must be the new coach's fault, right? No way. I cannot believe Flip wanted the Pistons, basically the only full time team in the NBA, to start playing one on four ala Kobe in the playoffs. Game 6, in Miami, you want Billups chucking unnecessary 3's with no other teammates even at half court? Or better yet, driving to the free throw, no one around and passing it out to the three point line for a similarly open shot out there? I mean, when did Detroit, known all season for driving to the basket become a jump shooting team? You wonder why their shooting percentages were so low, look no further. And don't even get me started on Hamilton's crying throughout the last two series. It is the playoffs and there will be contact. Deal with it; that is after all why you're getting paid. Their problem is strictly that too many of the Pistons feel that they truly are super stars like Kobe, Bron-Bron, D-Wade and Shaq (probably because they were voted
All Stars). The only consistent performer at both ends of the court all year long is the only Piston NOT voted to the All Star game - Tayshaun Prince. Go figure.

What does all of this lead to? I love this team, but I think Joe D. will see that the egos don't match the deeds and will be saying bye to some favorites. My choices? Bye-bye Billups and 'Sheed. Been nice knowing ya, good luck with the future and all, but the time has come. If Billups doesn't go, (and he should, because he is the on floor leader that orchestrated the one on four minimum matchups and mentality), then it has to be cry baby Hamilton. His defense has been wonderful, but you can't play D laying on the floor at what used to be the offensive zone crying about how you didn't get the call or flopping at the end of games or halves crying about the hack. The refs aren't changing their minds and would be crucified for making a questionable call at critical junctures (like halves and game ending buzzers). Stop whining and make the play.

In other leagues, the Tigers are playing just good enough to get interest to irritate people into believing...until the collapse and another playoff miss. The Lions? Still have Millen in charge, so they can't be going anywhere. I have trouble believing the Dolphins are ready for a Super Bowl ring, but within the contract they must be - I mean, look at some of the primary starters for the Lions and the good ones went on for rings somewhere: Rodney Peete - Dallas (and almost Carolina), Charlie Batch - Pittsburgh. Now is Harrington's turn. Go Dolphins!!!

Sometimes, it can be irritating to be a Detroit fan. You go from on high, to down low due to expectations. These teams all have talent and ability to play to potential, but there is little room for error at this level, which can crush that potential quickly. So, it'll be a long, slow wait until next year, when (at least in NHL and NBA) we should be back in the hunt again...

Kill the hostages...

Dinner time (as per usual):

The youngest HATES green beans, but per the household rule of needing to eat a single bite of all served, the green beans must be eaten...

Picture this, the youngest, face screwed for the worst, mouth open, green beans on fork (inside mouth), unable to chew. After minutes of this (you'd think the mouth would get tired, or at least want to be used, but I guess all the practice pays off...), I mentioned that the child should stop holding the vegetables hostage, the wife pipes up with...

KILL THE HOSTAGES!!! KILL THE HOSTAGES!!!
Youngest: Can't I just stick a fork in them and kill them that way?

Nope, they must be eaten. Not shot, not stabbed, EATEN. The child may still be at the dinner table trying to figure this one out...

Ultimately, the negotiations failed and the hostages were never found again (at least not on my watch...).

Clarification...

The wife was discussing matters of a medical nature with me the other night while in children's hearing. See, the wife has endomitriosis and has tried many different things in an effort to keep the pain in check. Lately, nothing seems to work, and the doctor has suggested having a full hysterectimy. So, while discussing this with me the other night, the following was the result:

Mom: So, the doctor suggested a hysterectimy...
Middle: What's that? What is a hystrectimy?
Mom: That's where they remove all my baby making parts...
Middle: Oh, you mean you're getting spayed? Like Dreamer the neighbor's dog?
Mom: Um, yeah - I'm getting spayed...

Welcome to my neutered world...

Monday, May 29, 2006

Lassie Wanna be...

After dinner, the puppie was going crazy whining and making herself a general nuisance. After a while, we realized she was trying to communicate ala Lassie. What did she want?

Turns out, Timmy was doing crack with the whores...

Who'da thunk it?

Happy Memorial Day...

To all those who are, have been or someday will be in the armed forces:

Thank you.

I may not always agree with why you have fought or are fighting, but I ALWAYS appreciate the job you do. Your sacrifice, even in times of peace, makes the world a better place and is the strength for which our country and its government can always barter for peace.

So, on this day of remembrance, thank you. Thank you for my freedoms. Thank you for your hard work, effort and many sacrifices. Thank you for being there for our families, our beliefs, our country. Thank you for all the things you do we know about, and all those you aren't allowed or can't tell us about. Thank you, and come home safe soon.

-The Price Crew

Funny how that works...

Youngest was running around the house with handcuffs (no, not fuzzy kind). So, I handcuffed the child, hands behind back and then chased the kid to another room. The child's response?

Youngest: I don't want my hands handcuffed behind me, I want my hand handcuffed to my foot...

So I complied. Unfortunately for the child, it was to the opposite foot,behind the other leg...then I chased the kid to return prior tortures...hehe.

Sometimes, it is good to be the Dad...

Yodilayee-O...

The youngest was singing today. Have I mentioned that our family can't sing? It was very poor quality and led to this loving discourse:

Me: Child, stop that warbling...
Youngest: (Warbling continues)
Me: Child, do you want me to kill you?
Youngest: (Warbling stops)No.(Warbling continues)
Me: (Shouting)CHILD!!!
Youngest: Are you going to kill me?
Mom: Yes, and I'm going to hold you down...
Oldest: And I'm going to be in the background laughing...

Feel the love?

Wednesday, May 17, 2006

Deetroit Basketball...

If these guys fold to the Cavaliers like the Wings did to the Oilers, I may just have to stop thinking about the former home teams...

I mean, Rip, what was that last second plea for a foul (which never works if you hadn't noticed, say, in any game in your career)? You're supposed to be be a big time, clutch player - take the shot.

Not that it all falls there. Why is Cleveland even in the games? Why are we playing for the last shot from the beginning of the game?

These guys are killing me...

Tuesday, May 16, 2006

It's all fun and games until somebody gets hurt...

Why I like my wife: The other day, while mowing the lawn, the wife was out and picking various items - rocks, branches, toys, whatever, up from the lawn for me. As she clearly was finishing (and in the way), I chased her with the lawn mower teasingly. This lasted a couple of times; until she became complacent. The last time, I chased her all over the yard leaving loops and whorls in my wonderful pattern.

Her response? Oh, that was to laugh, come inside, then dump water on my head from the deck.

Still not sure who got the best of who on this deal, but I have to say, no matter what happens in our household, we have fun almost every day. So, why do I like my wife? Because she allows me to have fun, has fun back, and we truly enjoy torturing each other and the children. In the end, we laugh until we cry and then do it all again. What could possibly be better than that?

Sunday, May 14, 2006

Truck Trouble...

My neighbor and I are building an erosion system since every time it rains, his yard gets eroded. So, after three years, we've started making progress to stop this. To make this work, we are building a series of trenches and filling the trenches with rocks to hold them open. The trenches are designed to catch and route the rain water where we want it to go. At this point we have all of the trenches dug and last weekend we began distributing the rocks in the trenches.

Unfortunately, we didn't quite get finished to where we were supposed to...which meant leaving (literally) a ton of rock in my truck overnight. Then, it decided to rain all night and most of the day. Late in the day, with the weather choosing not to break fully, I knew I needed to get the rock out of my truck as I would need it (without the extra weight) the next day.

Instead of staying close to the house (where it was dryer) - my bright idea was to drive right down to where the rain usually funnels (where it was wetter). When I didn't like my position, I figured the extra weight would help me get traction. Ummm, no. At this point, the only thing to do was to dump the load and figure out where to go from there. So, we began dumping the rocks out of my truck and it began to downpour. By the end, I was a huge, wet, mud ball mess.

We ended up needing to call the other neighbor over to tow my truck out (much to everyones amusement). This is the same guy who pulled it out when yet another neighbor got it stuck in his yard. I got even muddier crawling under the truck to hook it up for the tow. The wife is taking pictures, the neighbors are giving me a hard time, and even the kids were picking on me. Can't say it wasn't deserved, but it is hard for me to deal with those situations where I can't even make a comment back without making the whole thing worse.

Happy Mother's Day...

For all mothers and mothers-to-be: I hope you have a wonderful day full of love and caring from your families.

This morning, my wife got to sleep in, then put up with burnt muffins and playful bickering with her family - strange, but this is how we have fun and show each other we care. All in all, it has been a good morning. Later today, we're going to go see the Braves and just try to have a relaxing day all of today.

HAPPY MOTHER'S DAY!!!

Friday, May 12, 2006

Big Brother

It is not 1984, but thanks to 9/11 and Bush, Big Brother is here.

Click on the title and you'll be transferred to the latest article on the NSA phone database.

Thursday, May 11, 2006

Summer-itis...

The kids are beginning to suffer from this long standing disease. As the school year comes closer to an end (all of the kids are out here in the next two weeks), it is becoming more and more obvious. Last night (and this morning for various reasons), the youngest was working on a spelling assignment involving writing sentences. Here are the basic rules:

-Sentence must include the spelling word
-Sentence must also involve a basic topic (this week: People in America)


Best sentence not given to the child (using the spelling word WHEN): "We went to the fair."

And the child couldn't figure out why the sentence wouldn't work. Even worse, the first pass on the sentence was: "People in America went to the fair."

Yep, the child has tuned out for the summer - at least until I come up with sentences for the kid to write. Ahhh, good times torturing children...

Friday, May 05, 2006

The world is full of strange people...

Try this person. I KNOW my wife has enough trouble with me, why would she want multiples?

Then, if that doesn't make you feel better, there's always this guy.

These people are procreating. Seriously, the gene pool needs some chlorination folks...

Thursday, May 04, 2006

Tub Time...

While the youngest was taking a bath:

Mom: Shout up and see how that child is doing
Me: Kid? How are you doing?
Youngest: Fine.
Me: You haven't drowned yet?
Youngest: Nope.
Mom: Ask if the kid washed hair yet...
Me: Have you washed your hair?
Youngest: Yep.
Me: How 'bout your butt?
Youngest: Nope.
Me: Well, start thinking about it. You need to get out of the tub soon...
Youngest: Okay.

(count 1, count 2)

Youngest: I've thought about it...Nope, don't really want to wash my butt...Can it wait a little while longer?

Monday, May 01, 2006

@#$%...

Say what you will, but the Captain has been incredible. He has led for years by example. Whether he retires after this or not, he has brought many incredible moments. The Wings played 40 minutes of some of the most incredible hockey and truly didn't play the last 20 minutes. Legace, while not stellar, played about as well as you can expect of a goalie. He made the saves he needed to make. This game, more so than any of the others, the rest of the team failed to make the plays in the last 20. Horrible mistakes leaving players wide open and leaving Legace to make impossible saves. Edmonton didn't deserve to win - they came in and took every game they won. They made the plays when they had to - across the board. The Wings finally played dump and chase very well, but not for the entire game.

So, Captain, if you choose to go, you showed in this game exactly why you'll be missed. Other players need to step up and get the job done, and once again, they didn't. For the rest of the boys, in case you didn't know, the season is made in the playoffs, winning the Stanley Cup - not the President's trophy.

The long wait until next season begins...

What a day...

What is a sport fan to do when both of his favorite teams are playing at the same time? Why, utilize the little known feature of his TV - Picture in Picture. In so doing, I was able to watch both the Wings and the Pistons while both teams dominated play.

Let the good times roll...

Better than TV

There is a reason I put up with it...but sometimes, I have trouble remembering it...

The other night, after working hard, I settled onto the couch to listen to my MP3 player. I have an iPod with a stand, and in this particular case, I put the stand on my chest and laid down to rest. The rest of the family (at least those not already in bed) were playing cards and having a good time. I guess sleep overcame me...to the joy of the rest of my family. They all stopped what they were doing to point and laugh.

Seems that once I fell to sleep, the iPod and its stand started moving to my breathing making it almost seem to dance. I awoke to being laughed and pointed at. I was more amusing than cards, tv, or any other distraction. Glad I'm needed, even if it is for amusement only... ;)

Saturday, April 22, 2006

The boys are back...

Hockey is back. The Wings took the ice last night as distinct favorites; and I had to sit at a scouts meeting. So, while I DVR'd the game to watch little kids instead, I still knew THE GAME was back.

Upon returning home to take control of my TV - I watch the game. This lasted all the way to late in the third period - where I see Maltby tie it up with 6:17 left...and the DVR stopped. Dang thing only recorded 2.5 hours...the game was over, but I only knew it was tied with time on the clock. Immediately, I rush to the computer...to find my boys had taken a barn burning 1-0 series lead on an unlikely goal by Maltby in double overtime.

So, adrenaline is high. Add to that the Pistons begin their march Sunday, same day as game two in this series, and I am a serious sports addict. For the next two months, I'm glued...

Welcome back boys!!!

Tuesday, April 18, 2006

Technical Difficulties...

Sorry folks. We had some problems with the server which took getting some spare time to resolve. We now return you to your regularly scheduled post reading...

Monday, April 10, 2006

The Kid's Free!!!

Middle had the cast removed today!!! Yippee!!!!!!

College BasketBall...

Congrats to the lady Terps!!! One of the most exciting basketball games I've ever watched...even the wife was enthralled to a wonderful finish...

Monday, April 03, 2006

Price Crew: The Musical...

Seems that while Dad is out, the family will sing (sorry neighborhood). While running errands, the entire family decided to turn conversations into songs. See, not all of the craziness comes from my side...

Sunday, March 26, 2006

I found my new TV...

I found my new TV:



It has everything. Remote control, HD, PIP, everything...



Including easy access to the beer.

Saturday, March 25, 2006

Tip of the day

There is a reason Mr. Atkin advised against drinking alcohol while on his diet. And it had nothing to do with the whole metabolism thing or how the carbs could make you fat. It was the fact that a damn celery stick will NOT do any of that wonderful soaking up of alcohol that a potato chip or cracker loaded with spinach dip will. I now have a great respect for Taco Bell.

Monday, March 20, 2006

Um - could you repeat that?

With all the goings on at the homestead, you'd expect some missed time from school. I mean, we've broken one child, and then, to add insult to injury, the kid was bugged (lice) - literally. Obviously, this one is going to miss time from school...So, why did the other two come home early today?

The youngest was complaining of a headache (which didn't affect the after school activities) and the oldest had a sore throat - nothing antibiotics won't cure. I think my wife is looking forward to work so she can get some rest...

Sunday, March 19, 2006

Edit...

In the car today, enjoying some family time with the kids being kids. Since the oldest has become a teenager however, there has been some extra verbal freedom going on, but today, I couldn't take it.

Me: Please, stop making mean comments. I know you are trying to be funny, but today it is just annoying.
Oldest: Okay. Sorry Dad.

(Five minutes later)

Oldest: (talking to the youngest) ...and then, they eat your brains and it's just plain nasty because...
Me: Hey!!! Edit. That's one.
Oldest: Sorry Dad. Anyways, it is just plain nasty because...
Me: HEY!!! EDIT!!! That's two. Don't let me get to three...
Oldest: Sorry Dad. So, like I was saying, it is just plain nasty because it's all gray and gooey...
Me: HEY!!! That's...
Oldest: (with deer in the headlights look says sweetly) Edit?

Welcome to the teenage years...

More Dining Conversations...

During dinner (isn't it always?), the broken child keeps annoyingly repeating the same thing. After a couple minutes of this, the following occurs...

Mom: That's it. You need to stop, or I'm going to get your Dad's power stapler and staple your lips together...KA-CHUNK!!!

*crickets*

Me: (with tears still streaming from the silent laughter created by such an outrageous comment) Umm. Ka-Chunk? Where did that come from?

I like being home...

Thursday, March 16, 2006

What fresh hell is this?

Wow, I was so excited!!!! I had this week off of work. My boss took the week off so I thought, what the heck, I will too. My mom came into town, I thought I'd organize the garage which no car can park in, catch up on some things etc.... Let's just start with, as you know, the middle kid breaking her hand. This happened Sunday and of course the ER doc couldn't see the break so sent us on our way without so much as a bandaid. We get the call from the radiologist at 9:30pm that night stating her hand was broken and to come back tomorrow for a spint, and they say NO she can't go to school. I love my kids very very much, but there goes one of my scheduled days off I had planned to shop leisurely with my mom, have lunch, maybe tea. Of course we can't get into the Orthopaedic people until 4:45pm on Monday. Day shot to hell, running into Atlanta, fighting rush hour traffic etc.....Oh well, I really am not complaining (yet), it's one of those things. No big. Really. Until today when I wake up, stretch, and contemplate, ok, house guests gone (check), kids going to school (check), Ok, I plan my day, I think I will go to the gym, figure out what to have for dinner, maybe go to the garden nursey. Sounds great until you wake broken child up and she complains of massive itching at the back of her head. Yup, you guessed it.....raging case of head lice! EXPLITIVE EXPLITIVE EXPLITIVE!!!!! Was I a bad person in my past life, or hell, last week? Damn, I give up, I am never going to ask for leisure time off of work again. As you all know, the last time I did this the son (yes he had the shots) had chicken pox. I am cursed. All of this and of course the hubby is out of town. I really need a large (or multiple) drink(s), except I started a stupid diet yesterday. So, if you come across a flabby, drunk, itchy person running up and down the store isle looking for the Rid, just get out of my way or I will rub my head on you!!!

Sunday, March 12, 2006

The Broken Brat

The middle child is at it again...

Screwing around in the house, spinning around for fun and instead of falling on face, tries to use the hand...First diagnosis - severe sprain. Comes home, hopping and jumping around about "I've got a free pass, free paaaasss, free paaaaasss. No PE for ME...". Mind you, jumping - hard core. So, I wrote the note to the PE teacher to let the child run sprints all class. Then the child has the audacity to try to get out of chores - can't do dishes or clear table - it might get more hurt. The plays for sympathy and laziness were all around...

Unfortunately, the ER called back after hours. Radiologist has looked at the X-Ray and determined there is breakage. The brat broke the hand. The right (or write) hand. Free pass - check. Chores lessened - check. Someone to write for the child...umm, still working on it. Radiologist stated it was imperative the child return to be splinted - in the morning. Think we'll use the frequent flyer miles with the orthopaedic doc. Dang kid. I'm so mad I might break the other arm.

Middle child syndrom stinks.

Saturday, March 11, 2006

Show me the love...

One of my kids had a friend over, causing the following explanation:

Me: Why were you arguing?
Kid: Because he was annoying me...
Me: Next time, just kiss him...
Kid: I did, but then he went to kiss me back, and so I tried to lick him. Then, he said he was going to french kiss me, so I hit him...

Sometimes, I miss being a kid...

Sunday, March 05, 2006

Another Day in the Life...

Life has been a little stressful of late - long work hours, less time at home (even working in town); just very crazy. Then, just as things look up, it appears some changes come along which then resets everything and makes me think I'll be working even longer hours with even less time at home. Anyway, I wanted to get a note out to let everyone know that we are thinking about them and look forward to hearing from people even if we've been quiet...

On that note, my mother in law comes in to town next weekend. The wife and kids are ecstatic. If it weren't for the marriage license rule stating I can't like my in-laws, I'd be ecstatic too. Seriously, those of you who know my mother-in-law know that she is a fun person to be around - and even though she spits in every house we buy/rent (long story), she's always welcome because it is always so much fun. After next weekend, there should be a story or two to tell...I mean, this is after all the woman who watered our TV set once upon a time...

Sunday, February 26, 2006

A day in the life...

Today, while torturing children (our regular Sunday schedule of activities), the following discourse in familial behavior occurs:

Child: Dad, that was not nice...
Me: Yep, you're right. And you know what else? Very few people have ever accused me of being nice. You know what else? In every instance, they were wrong...

It's good to have a loving family...Otherwise, who else would put up with me?

And so it begins...

Pardon me a second while I set up the soapbox.

All right, let the rant begin...

*BEGIN RANT*

South Dakota is looking to repeal the ability to have abortions. Now, I'll freely admit that I don't remember a world prior to Roe v. Wade. A world where women went in to back rooms and dirty alleys to have "procedures". Somehow, people think this would be safer - because let's not kid ourselves - people will get abortions.

Being a man, I may disagree with lots of assumptions around abortions. I disagree that the father should have no choice. I disagree that things should be kept so secret that the father does not even have to be notified beforehand (or at least that it is so easy to get around this rule). I disagree that there are enough other things to prevent unwanted pregnancies, or to convince women there are other choices. I disagree that there is not a percentage of women using abortions as birth control.

However, in the grand scheme of things, I still don't see how any of this changes the fact that pregnancy has the greatest effect on women. Being a man, I won't ever have to go through the hormone induced emotions of a pregnancy. I'll never have to have my body morph out of control for nine months. I'll never need to deal with stigmas related to being a single mother, or the definite impact of being responsible for a child I didn't want in the first place. I'll never have to face a decision which will impact me for the rest of my life - regardless of the choice. For me, it is frustrating not having a say - for a woman, it is extremely detrimental to not have this say.

Are there options short of abortion? Definitely. Women who don't want these babies can give them to the fathers or give them up for adoption. How many people actually feel that after carrying another being for nine months will be able to give that being away? Now, assuming they did, how many would still have a VERY profound problem dealing with it? Once you make that decision, it is every bit as final as abortion, and there are a lot more emotional attachments.

This leaves us with more people having kids they didn't want, and in many cases this will turn to anger or neglect being directed to the child eventually in my opinion. Is this better than abortion? Take a look at our society now. I strongly feel that our society has gotten away from caring enough about our kids. How many kids parents are both forced to work? How much of this causes them to not be around when their kids need guidance? Now add to that the numerous families which are single parent homes, which only makes the issue that much worse. Let's not even get into those homes where the parents are there, but instead of wanting to be parents, they want to be their kids best friends. Now that we understand this structure, we want to add thousands more kids into these situations?

This is my stance on abortion: I believe that if you choose to do the things which cause pregnancy, you need to be ready to make the decisions which go along with that choice. Every action has consequences and this is no different. For me, the choice was/is/always will be simple. It is one of the few things in my life that has always been black and white. For me, I could never propose an abortion. For me, that thought would be devastating. However, for me, the implications applied by society make this choice almost entirely financial. Big difference. For me, being a father was never going to be enough - when the choice came up, I knew I'd always be a Dad. Does this mean that I wouldn't support the choice for abortion? Absolutely not. Again, being male, it becomes more financial. For the women, the financial aspect is the afterthought. Regardless of decisions past having the baby, this decision is the most profound a woman will ever make - on her body, on her life, on her future.

While I would never choose abortion for myself or my family, I can see why people do. To remove this safe alternative, even while I don't agree with its use, would be abominable. As I've stated before, I think there are lots of things we as a society can do to help reduce abortion rates - which would be good. This does not imply though, that I feel abortion should not be an option. I am not in those women's shoes, needing to make such a profound decision on her body, life and future. If it were me in their shoes, I sure wouldn't be happy with someone else attempting to limit my choices in such a way. Not only do I think it would be wrong for the women, but I also think it would be wrong for the children and for society.

*END RANT*

Saturday, February 25, 2006

It's not you, it's me...

It has been abismally long since my last post. I feel as if I should beg forgiveness, list all the reasons and pray you don't hold it against me. Instead, I'm going to jump into another story, so, without further adieu...

Last weekend we met my sister and her family in Lexington, KY for a quick gathering. As most people know, our kids are similar in age, and after having spent the majority of their lives less than a block apart, are as close as siblings. As a result, we still try to get the kids together a couple times a year even though we've moved 1,000 miles away. Anyway, this was one of those times.

First night, kids went swimming. Next day, the wives get the bright idea of going ice skating. Probably not the brightest idea, but things were looking OK until near the end. My twice surgically repaired knee was holding up. None of the kids managed to fall so bad they split their head open and everyone was having a good time. Then IT happened. Yep - there was my sister, out on the ice, pretending to be Nancy Kerrigan and IT JUST HAPPENED. She lined up for the triple toe loop and the rest is just a blur. End result: One dislocated knee, three attempt to talk her out of suing, many pain meds, alcoholic drinks and a ton of new jokes to liberally apply for the next several years - and still she didn't want to go to the hospital.

"I'll be fine", "It's just a knee". We let her stew for a couple hours, because I know I wouldn't have wanted to go the the ER in a strange state, but she wouldn't see reason - until morning. She looked very constipated as she spoke the words sparking more meaningless jokes: "I need to go to the ER. Not because my knee really needs to be immobilized or because I'm screaming in pain as I try to walk, but because, I, uh, just need a note for work while I'M SITTING DOWN." Yep, that is her story and we're letting her stick to it.

So, while I give her high marks for the effort, the judges were forced to disqualify her for not completing her short program. Someday we'll find Tonya and Gillooly with the lead pipe in the conservatory, but alas, my sister's ice skating career has come to a close...

Monday, February 13, 2006

Snow Days...

We had a veritable snow flurry yesterday. The kids all ran outside to play in the snow in their PJs; it was too funny. The youngest kept trying to get the snowflakes from outside to the freezer. Now, keep in mind they saw real snow when we were home for Thanksgiving, but for some reason, down here, they forget what it's like. So, they played outdoors for two hours in our "snow storm" which at the end of the day left no snow on the ground. Then they got excited about the possibility of this "blizzard" keeping them out of school. Alas, even with ground cover in the morning, the school system was able to open and take in the wayward children.

For this, Mom was extremely thankful.

Monday, February 06, 2006

Annoying, yet funny...

I found this song about the llamas and ducks very annoying when I first heard it via an email chain letter. Because it was annoying, I deliberately did not share with my family. However, the oldest learned of it from friends, and now has the entire family singing it - all the time. So, I figure, the quickest way to desensitize myself to it is to make others as addicted to it as my family seems to be so I can begin to ignore at will...something you'd think I'd be able to do without sharing...alas, it twas not to be.

Everyone - Llama llama llama DUCK!!!

Times, they are a changing...

Here's a story I found interesting. Congratulations!!!

Monday, January 30, 2006

Things that make you go hmmmm...

Not sure how we show up #6 in this search, but I ain't arguing...

They say it's your Birthday...

Happy birthday to the most wonderful wife in the whole wide world. Today, my wife hits 33 and finally catches up to me. So, to the most important person in my life, I want to say "Happy Birthday". You may be getting older, but you definitely are getting better with age.

Today, I offer the following reminiscences:

-Remember way back BC (Before Children)? Remember playing "footsies" under the table at Silverman's?

-Remember our first apartment? Remember your mother "christening" the walls (and every new place since)?

-Remember THE waterfight?

-Remember saying "I do"?

-Remember our first house?

-Remember the flamingos on the lawn?

There are so many other remembrances we can add in here, and it doesn't even cover half of your life. For my part, I'm glad to have you catch up, but more importantly, I'm looking forward to sharing the next 33 (and then some) with you. So, while it may not be flowers (yet), please remember that you are my world and that your family loves you very much.

Now, let the spankings begin...

Sunday, January 29, 2006

Dorks...

I don't know what spawned the comment, but I called the children by their pet nicknames - Dork1, Dork2 and Dork3. Unfortunately, that spawned an argument between them about who was who...

So, to assuage further argument, here is the order:

Dork1 belongs to the oldest as this child has been dorkier longer.
Dork2 belongs to the youngest child as this child has taken dork to a whole new level.
Dork3 belongs to the middle child, as this one just kinda makes you shake your head.

In the meantime, they ofttimes refer to us, their adoring parents, as "Pinkie"...according to Dork2, this was being applied as Junie B. Jones sometimes calls her grandfather "Pinkie". It worked about as well with him as it does with us. Anyway, whenever Dork2 refers to one of us this way, it always reminds the wife and I of "Pinkie and the Brain" which then causes us to sing the theme song:

They're Pinkie and the Brain, Pinkie and the Brain.
One is a genius, the other insane.
They're laboratory mice, their genes have been spliced.
They're dinky, they're dinky, they're Pinkie and the Brain, Brain, Brain, Brain...dun-de-dun-dun
NARF!!!

Hmm, maybe they come by it honestly...

Saturday, January 28, 2006

Erroneous Placement...

While snuggling with the wife, the oldest comes up to snuggle as well and the following occurs:

Oldest: What's wrong Dad?
Me: Erroneous placement of elbow...
Oldest: Ewwww...sorry.
Wife: He he, he didn't say "you elbowed me in the balls", he said "Erroneous placement of elbow"...
Oldest: Yeah, he could have said "You elbowed me in the nads..."
Wife: You said "nads". He He

Do you feel the love? Yeah, me neither...

War...

This morning, I took the (nerf) gun, snuck up on the enemy encampment (the wife reading her magazine) from above (the upstairs walkway) and the ambush ensued. It was crazy, to the point that the enemy was winging bullets back at me as fast as I could shoot them. The children became embroiled in the nastiest with the oldest choosing a weapon and joining me, while the middle was hurling back with mother. The youngest? Well, that smart child was winging it for whoever seemed to be winning, which was good for me since I had the high ground. So, with the youngest grabbing our bullets and returning them, the oldest and I pummelled the enemy.

At some point however, all of the children turned and I was pinned in a corner. It was crazy and I was just glad to get out alive. So, amidst laughter and flying missles, I was just happy to escape alive. War, at least in this family, is(n't) hell...

Friday, January 27, 2006

Cycle of Life...

It's been a very crazy couple of weeks. First, one of the people I've worked with forever had his brother pass away. Just as he's getting ready to come back, another co-worker had his grandfather pass. On the same day, my aunt passed. The next day? Well, another co-worker I've worked with forever had his wife pass away.

Currently, we are all working on the same project, so logistics have been fun and concentration has been rare. On a personal note, my thoughts are with each and every person impacted by these losses. Two of the deaths were somewhat expected, while the other two were totally unexpected, however, many people have been and will be deeply affected by these losses.

My thoughts are with you Don, Jim, Mark, Marq - there is nothing I can say which can express my sadness for your losses. Time will help the pain somewhat, but it cannot take away the memories and the good times. Our loved ones live on with us, in our hearts, minds and souls. We recognize them in our friends, families and other loved ones. They've touched all who knew them and have made the world a better place for it. They will be missed and never forgotten.

Sunday, January 22, 2006

Open Letter...

To the glorious people at Radiant Research, Inc.,

I realize some women suffer premenstrual symptoms that go beyond what can be effectively managed in regular ways. I know there can be severe mood swings and physical symptoms interferring with everyday life. I have experience with these issues first hand.

Yes, the week prior to menstruation, I suffer symptoms such as irritability, depression, anxiety, sleep problems, difficulty concentrating, angry outbursts and even physical problems such as bloating and these symptoms always disappear a few days afterwards, but somehow, I don't think I could be suffering from premenstrual dysphoric disorder.

So, while I'm glad there is a physician researching this very set of issues, I promise I cannot be a qualified participant. While the free physical exams, laboratory tests, "other" medical assessments and potential study "medicine or placebo" sound wonderful, I don't think they'll be necessary. I realize there is no guarantee for signing up, but I guarantee that this letter truly irritated me.

Why you ask - especially when I have so many of the symptoms of PMDD? Well, because I'm a 33 year old MALE you ninnies!!! I, like so many men before me and after me, suffer along with my wife these wonderful symptoms. I get severe mood swings due to my wife changing personalities. I get physical symptoms, because I don't duck fast enough and my wife beats the crap out of me. These things make me irritable and depressed. As all good husbands know, when your wife doesn't sleep, you don't sleep either, which then causes difficulty concentrating (especially when trying to avoid flying objects) and angry outbursts. Personally, I think the bloating tends to get caused due to the high level of sodium the family gets in our diet around this time, but it could be caused by so many of the other varying factors too. But in the end, I'm still a man and cannot be part of your study.

Hmm, come to think of it, if you were any good at your jobs, you'd already know I was male and not eligible, which now makes me think the doc may also be a quack since he probably spent less on getting you involved then he would on a pack of gum. Please, for future reference, don't contact me for anything - male or female related you ignoramous'.

Thanks,

Management (aka darprice)

It's their first...

As some of you may know, I'm a crazed NHL fan, made even more rabid by the unholy happenstance of a year with no hockey and beginning the season in a great NHL town with nothing else to do. I won't go into too much detail there, but I've seen more NHL games in person this year then I've seen all the rest of my life combined. As a result, I'm finding I tend to watch more games on TV too. (Note to Gary Bettman: OHL was not the answer to ESPN's reduced bid. Please fix this fiasco immediately. Thanks.)

Now, I don't watch a lot of sports or push for too much TV time generally as I'll watch most anything. I can dish on Desparate Housewives and Grey's Anatomy with as much vim and vigor as I can about Teen Titan's and the like. About the only thing I cannot abide anymore is Sponge Bob - and that only because I've seen every episode at least 5 times and now get it in stereo - from the wife if not the children, but I digress. When I do happen to turn an NHL game on for a few minutes, it can clear a room. But this year, all of the children asked to be taken to a game. The wife (who is also an avid NHL fan) and I couldn't resist the temptation, especially since we live in an area that has tickets for $10 (even before the lockout) always available. So, last night we took the plunge.

The kids, not knowing what to expect were immediately excited and nervous. Excited for the experience, while nervous that they wouldn't like it. The youngest even got nervous when they turned the lights down because he didn't know what was going to happen. As it turns out, they all enjoyed the game tremendously and are looking forward to going some other time soon (guess I need to get another job). It was the kids first professional sporting event, and I think we've got 'em hooked. So, while the home team lost, the kids won - and ultimately, that is the way things should always work out.

It takes all kinds...

My wife is turning 33 this month. As an early birthday gift, I took her to see one of her favorite bands - Aerosmith. Well, let me rephrase - I took her so she could drool over one of her favorite celebrities - Steven Tyler. (Honestly, I've never gotten the infatuation, but since I adore Liv, I suppose I can let this slide...)

Anywho, we went to the concert and had a great time. And while I love Aerosmith's music, I must say that the crowd around us may have been more entertaining by far. First, there was the guy in the row immediately behind us who for some strange reason, every time he moved to the beat of either a mellow Lenny Kravitz song or a raucous chorus of one of the Aerosmith tunes, would rock back and forth spasmodically while rubbing the left side of his chest. It gets even funnier when the girl he was with (as shown by her sitting irritatedly in her chair and plether pants while holding his hand), refused to acknowledge anything around her.

Next special group, were a couple in the row immediately in front of us, neither of which had rhythm. They reminded me nothing so much as today's yuppie crowd, who would have fit nicely in with the peace/love/rock'n'roll crowd of the 60's. I'm thinking they must have been hopped on drugs as well since that (and Aerosmith) would be about all to connect the two very disparate groups of people I could see them melding with.

The last was a couple immediately in front of us. For the life of me, I still can't figure out what they were doing at the concert. They both were attempting to take naps on each other during the whole thing. I mean, why pay money to go to a public place for a nap? And if you're going to do it anyway, why not just pay the cover charge at a bar and get smoke too?

Anyway, these were the groups I found most interesting. In the meantime, Lenny, Steven (and now apparently Joe Perry) kept the wife drooling. Couple all of this with amazing music and a great show, and we obviously had a good time. So, happy early birthday baby - and ROCK ON!!!

Friday, January 20, 2006

Here's wishing a happy birthday to the oldest...

The oldest turns a defining age today: 13

Yes, we now have a teenager in the house. To celebrate, we took the child and a few friends (both boys and girls) out to dinner. To give an example of the conversation, I decided to take notes on the topics. I might have missed a few, but this is a fairly accurate sampling:

-Birds and the Bees (or, what every parent of a new teen wants to discuss with their kids and their friends)
Kid 1: Oooh, I remember having the conversation about the birds and the bees...
Kid 2: Huh. I didn't get a stinking birds and bees conversation, my parents were much more blunt on the subject...

-Burning to a crisp (I couldn't even begin to understand how the segway worked here)
Kid 1: You'd burn to a crisp, at least when Mercury and Venus vaporize...
Kid 2: Yeah, but you wouldn't want to be in a cold bath when it happens, because, then, the water would boil and just burn you worse...

-Nuclear Weapons Ummm, cause it's kinda similar to burning for environmental reasons?

-Ferrets Because one of the kids just got one...
Kid: And my ferret has a magnet in his head. Either that, or he's just dumb. He keeps banging his head on his cage... (kinda like I started doing on the table probably...)

-Screetching chalkboards Because this is important to every student

-Jumping out of playschool windows This is just a natural transition folks...

-Hw to hurt each other Yep, their friends (maybe even BFF)

Fashion Designers From one of the boys. This boy already has a very strong sense of self and masculinity. But again, I never could figure out how this transition in conversation happened.

So, by the end of dinner, I knew it to be official that I had a teenager in the house by the fact that I no longer understood the conversation changes, let alone content. It really is going to stink with all of us being this confused all the time...