A day in the life...

Today, while torturing children (our regular Sunday schedule of activities), the following discourse in familial behavior occurs:

Child: Dad, that was not nice...
Me: Yep, you're right. And you know what else? Very few people have ever accused me of being nice. You know what else? In every instance, they were wrong...

It's good to have a loving family...Otherwise, who else would put up with me?

And so it begins...

Pardon me a second while I set up the soapbox.

All right, let the rant begin...

*BEGIN RANT*

South Dakota is looking to repeal the ability to have abortions. Now, I'll freely admit that I don't remember a world prior to Roe v. Wade. A world where women went in to back rooms and dirty alleys to have "procedures". Somehow, people think this would be safer - because let's not kid ourselves - people will get abortions.

Being a man, I may disagree with lots of assumptions around abortions. I disagree that the father should have no choice. I disagree that things should be kept so secret that the father does not even have to be notified beforehand (or at least that it is so easy to get around this rule). I disagree that there are enough other things to prevent unwanted pregnancies, or to convince women there are other choices. I disagree that there is not a percentage of women using abortions as birth control.

However, in the grand scheme of things, I still don't see how any of this changes the fact that pregnancy has the greatest effect on women. Being a man, I won't ever have to go through the hormone induced emotions of a pregnancy. I'll never have to have my body morph out of control for nine months. I'll never need to deal with stigmas related to being a single mother, or the definite impact of being responsible for a child I didn't want in the first place. I'll never have to face a decision which will impact me for the rest of my life - regardless of the choice. For me, it is frustrating not having a say - for a woman, it is extremely detrimental to not have this say.

Are there options short of abortion? Definitely. Women who don't want these babies can give them to the fathers or give them up for adoption. How many people actually feel that after carrying another being for nine months will be able to give that being away? Now, assuming they did, how many would still have a VERY profound problem dealing with it? Once you make that decision, it is every bit as final as abortion, and there are a lot more emotional attachments.

This leaves us with more people having kids they didn't want, and in many cases this will turn to anger or neglect being directed to the child eventually in my opinion. Is this better than abortion? Take a look at our society now. I strongly feel that our society has gotten away from caring enough about our kids. How many kids parents are both forced to work? How much of this causes them to not be around when their kids need guidance? Now add to that the numerous families which are single parent homes, which only makes the issue that much worse. Let's not even get into those homes where the parents are there, but instead of wanting to be parents, they want to be their kids best friends. Now that we understand this structure, we want to add thousands more kids into these situations?

This is my stance on abortion: I believe that if you choose to do the things which cause pregnancy, you need to be ready to make the decisions which go along with that choice. Every action has consequences and this is no different. For me, the choice was/is/always will be simple. It is one of the few things in my life that has always been black and white. For me, I could never propose an abortion. For me, that thought would be devastating. However, for me, the implications applied by society make this choice almost entirely financial. Big difference. For me, being a father was never going to be enough - when the choice came up, I knew I'd always be a Dad. Does this mean that I wouldn't support the choice for abortion? Absolutely not. Again, being male, it becomes more financial. For the women, the financial aspect is the afterthought. Regardless of decisions past having the baby, this decision is the most profound a woman will ever make - on her body, on her life, on her future.

While I would never choose abortion for myself or my family, I can see why people do. To remove this safe alternative, even while I don't agree with its use, would be abominable. As I've stated before, I think there are lots of things we as a society can do to help reduce abortion rates - which would be good. This does not imply though, that I feel abortion should not be an option. I am not in those women's shoes, needing to make such a profound decision on her body, life and future. If it were me in their shoes, I sure wouldn't be happy with someone else attempting to limit my choices in such a way. Not only do I think it would be wrong for the women, but I also think it would be wrong for the children and for society.

*END RANT*

It's not you, it's me...

It has been abismally long since my last post. I feel as if I should beg forgiveness, list all the reasons and pray you don't hold it against me. Instead, I'm going to jump into another story, so, without further adieu...

Last weekend we met my sister and her family in Lexington, KY for a quick gathering. As most people know, our kids are similar in age, and after having spent the majority of their lives less than a block apart, are as close as siblings. As a result, we still try to get the kids together a couple times a year even though we've moved 1,000 miles away. Anyway, this was one of those times.

First night, kids went swimming. Next day, the wives get the bright idea of going ice skating. Probably not the brightest idea, but things were looking OK until near the end. My twice surgically repaired knee was holding up. None of the kids managed to fall so bad they split their head open and everyone was having a good time. Then IT happened. Yep - there was my sister, out on the ice, pretending to be Nancy Kerrigan and IT JUST HAPPENED. She lined up for the triple toe loop and the rest is just a blur. End result: One dislocated knee, three attempt to talk her out of suing, many pain meds, alcoholic drinks and a ton of new jokes to liberally apply for the next several years - and still she didn't want to go to the hospital.

"I'll be fine", "It's just a knee". We let her stew for a couple hours, because I know I wouldn't have wanted to go the the ER in a strange state, but she wouldn't see reason - until morning. She looked very constipated as she spoke the words sparking more meaningless jokes: "I need to go to the ER. Not because my knee really needs to be immobilized or because I'm screaming in pain as I try to walk, but because, I, uh, just need a note for work while I'M SITTING DOWN." Yep, that is her story and we're letting her stick to it.

So, while I give her high marks for the effort, the judges were forced to disqualify her for not completing her short program. Someday we'll find Tonya and Gillooly with the lead pipe in the conservatory, but alas, my sister's ice skating career has come to a close...

Snow Days...

We had a veritable snow flurry yesterday. The kids all ran outside to play in the snow in their PJs; it was too funny. The youngest kept trying to get the snowflakes from outside to the freezer. Now, keep in mind they saw real snow when we were home for Thanksgiving, but for some reason, down here, they forget what it's like. So, they played outdoors for two hours in our "snow storm" which at the end of the day left no snow on the ground. Then they got excited about the possibility of this "blizzard" keeping them out of school. Alas, even with ground cover in the morning, the school system was able to open and take in the wayward children.

For this, Mom was extremely thankful.

Annoying, yet funny...

I found this song about the llamas and ducks very annoying when I first heard it via an email chain letter. Because it was annoying, I deliberately did not share with my family. However, the oldest learned of it from friends, and now has the entire family singing it - all the time. So, I figure, the quickest way to desensitize myself to it is to make others as addicted to it as my family seems to be so I can begin to ignore at will...something you'd think I'd be able to do without sharing...alas, it twas not to be.

Everyone - Llama llama llama DUCK!!!

Times, they are a changing...

Here's a story I found interesting. Congratulations!!!