When I've been travelling for work, it is quite a bit harder on the wife and I'm afraid I'm not much help. See, I've missed beating the children, so I must spend time torturing them when I get back. For this reason, the wife has begun to refer to me as her fourth child and has also started requesting a vacation for some reason (well, at least she isn't re-enacting that old Calgon commercial).
So, while the oldest is putting away dishes, I begin torturing a bit and the following occurs:
Oldest: Ow. (tried to kick me and kicked the cabinet instead)
Wife: I have four children. Not three. Four.
Oldest: Yeah, well, I'm going to get even with him...
Wife: Uhhh. I need a vacation
Oldest: Yep, and I NEED a drink
I'm guessing the wife has had other new sayings this week too. She should be out of rehab in just a few more weeks. We all wish her well and hope she enjoys the kind of vacation which brings about withdrawals.