More fun body humor...

The youngest daughter is commonly known as our frat girl. This is because of her tendency to belch and fart pretty much whenever the need arises (usually half way through dinner). So, we tend to have a very similar talk nightly addressing the issue. Tonight's went like this, and needless to say did not have the intended impact:

Daughter: (machine gun sounds with her behind)
All: (Looking at her horrified)
Daughter: (Belches a 7.2 on the richter)
All: (again with the horror)
Me: Um, again, and I want to remind you I say this nightly, but if you really feel the need to poop your pants and puke like that, please do so away (preferably far, far away) from the table
All: YOU SAID POOP AND PUKE!!!! TOO FUNNY!!!

Yeah, next time I think I might let the wife handle it. Well, at least the daughter is pretty...

Dairy Air...

So, we're talking to the sick boy at the dinner table and he made some smart comment to which the following conversation gets started:

Me: Boy, you're lucky the doctor didn't give you a shot in the dairyair (buttocks, hind section, "back there")
Son: (Laughing - cause he knew I meant butt) - No, the needle would have had to pass through the knoxious cloud before it penetrated that area...
Son: (after a moment of though) - I guess that'd be flatulence, not dairyair...
Son: (still laughing) I got shot in my flatulence and dairyair!!! or I coulda anyways...

Oh to be young again and find behinds that funny. Instead, I just find mine flabby and flatulence tends to be more of a problem than a punchline. Viva la difference!!!

Leaving a legend...

They don't get much better than Johnny Carson. Another legend passes leaving a large hole. He will be missed. Goodbye Johnny!

Another Day Older...

So, the oldest miraculously made it another year (was touch and go for a while there...). Happy birthday Bugs!!!

Big present was a guitar - she's stil shaking so hard it can play itself. Now, where did I put those earplugs...

More from the pretty files...

So, I'm gone. The laser level is out. Can the family leave it alone? Of course not - which is probably a good thing otherwise the following wouldn't have happened...

Oldest: Cool, Dad left his level out. How's it work (while playing with it)
Wife: I don't know, if you figure it out, let me know...
Oldest: OUCH!!!! (as she pokes herself with the stabilizing needle (for hands free level action)
Wife: (laughing) What did you do?
Oldest: (sucking finger) IT BIT ME?

Now, it's at this point the wife picks up the level and proceeds to play with the other end looking for the laser...

Wife: OUCH!!! IT BIT ME TOO!!!

And so neither figured out how to use it until I got home.

It must be the dye, but they are SOOOOO Pretty!!!